Millennium Mambo, Part 2-ish

Two more big lists have been published asserting the finest films of the decade. The haughtier of the two came from The Toronto International Film Festival Cinematheque, which surveyed a group of "film curators, historians, and festival programmers" and named, in a surprise move, Apichatpong Weerasethakul's Syndromes and a Century the best film of the 2000s. I'm in agreement with almost their entire list, aside from Claire Denis' Beau travail (not because I don't absolutely adore the film, but because by my own regulations, it counts as a 1999 film) [Abbas Kiarostami's The Wind Will Carry Us falls into the same place for me], Guillermo del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth (which is fine, but doesn't need to be that high) and Elephant, which should not be listed above Gerry (or Paranoid Park, which isn't on the list). I also don't have much affinity for I Don't Want to Sleep Alone, I'm Not There., Alexandra or Saraband (from what I remember of it), but that's part of the joy in lists like these, no? The list is as follows, with plenty of ties, the US distributor if applicable is listed after the title for assistance:

01. Syndromes and a Century, 2006, d. Apichatpong Weerasethakul, Thailand/France/Austria, Strand Releasing

02. Platform, 2000, d. Jia Zhang-ke, China/Hong Kong/Japan/France, New Yorker Films

03. Still Life, 2006, d. Jia Zhang-ke, China/Hong Kong, New Yorker Films

04. Beau travail, 1999/2000, d. Claire Denis, France, New Yorker Films

05. In the Mood for Love, 2000, d. Wong Kar-wai, Hong Kong/China/France, USA Films/Criterion

06. Tropical Malady, 2004, d. Apichatpong Weerasethakul, Thailand/France/Germany/Italy, Strand Releasing

07. (tie) The Death of Mr. Lăzărescu [Moartea domnului Lăzărescu], 2005, d. Cristi Puiu, Romania, Tartan Films
07. (tie) Werckmeister Harmonies [Werckmeister harmóniák], 2000, d. Béla Tarr, Ágnes Hranitzky, Hungary/Italy/Germany/France, Facets

08. Éloge de l'amour [In Praise of Love], 2001, d. Jean-Luc Godard, France/Switzerland, New Yorker Films

09. 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days [4 luni, 3 săptămâni şi 2 zile], 2007, d. Cristian Mungiu, Romania, IFC Films

10. Silent Light [Stellet licht], 2007, d. Carlos Reygadas, Mexico/France/Netherlands/Germany, Palisades Tartan

11. Russian Ark, 2002, d. Aleksandr Sokurov, Russia/Germany, Wellspring

12. The New World, 2005, d. Terrence Malick, USA/UK, New Line

13. Blissfully Yours, 2002, d. Apichatpong Weerasethakul, Thailand/France, Strand Releasing

14. Le fils [The Son], 2002, d. Jean-Pierre Dardenne, Luc Dardenne, Belgium/France, New Yorker Films

15. Colossal Youth [Juventude Em Marcha], 2006, d. Pedro Costa, Portugal/France/Switzerland, Criterion (unreleased as of yet)

16. (tie) Les glaneurs et la glaneuse [The Gleaners & I], 2000, d. Agnès Varda, France, Zeitgeist
16. (tie) In Vanda's Room [No Quarto da Vanda], 2000, d. Pedro Costa, Portugal/Germany/Switzerland/Italy, Criterion (unreleased as of yet)
16. (tie) Songs from the Second Floor [Sånger från andra våningen], 2000, d. Roy Andersson, Sweden/Norway/Denmark, New Yorker Films

17. (tie) Caché, 2005, d. Michael Haneke, France/Austria/Germany/Italy, Sony Pictures Classics
17. (tie) A History of Violence, 2005, d. David Cronenberg, USA/Germany, New Line
17. (tie) Mulholland Drive, 2001, d. David Lynch, France/USA, Universal Studios
17. (tie) Three Times, 2005, d. Hou Hsiao-hsien, Taiwan/France, IFC Films

18. Rois et reine [Kings and Queen], 2004, d. Arnaud Desplechin, France, Wellspring

19. Elephant, 2003, d. Gus Van Sant, USA, HBO Films

20. Talk to Her [Hable con ella], 2002, d. Pedro Almodóvar, Spain, Sony Pictures Classics

21. (tie) The Wind Will Carry Us, 1999/2000, d. Abbas Kiarostami, Iran/France, New Yorker Films
21. (tie) Yi yi: A One and Two, 2000, d. Edward Yang, Taiwan/Japan, Fox Lorber/Criterion

22. Pan's Labyrinth [El laberinto del Fauno], 2006, d. Guillermo del Toro, Mexico/Spain/USA, Picturehouse/New Line

23. (tie) L'enfant, 2005, d. Jean-Pierre Dardenne, Luc Dardenne, Belgium/France, Sony Pictures Classics
23. (tie) The Heart of the World, 2000, d. Guy Maddin, Canada, Zeitgeist
23. (tie) I Don't Want to Sleep Alone, 2006, d. Tsai Ming-liang, Taiwan/Malaysia/China/France/Austria, Strand Releasing
23. (tie) Star Spangled to Death, 2004, d. Ken Jacobs, USA, Big Commotion Pictures

24. The World, 2004, d. Jia Zhang-ke, China/Japan/France, Zeitgeist

25. (tie) Café Lumière, 2003, d. Hou Hsiao-hsien, Japan/Taiwan, Wellspring
25. (tie) The Headless Woman [La mujer sin cabeza], 2008, d. Lucrecia Martel, Argentina/France/Italy/Spain, Strand Releasing
25. (tie) L'intrus [The Intruder], 2004, d. Claire Denis, France, Wellspring
25. (tie) Millennium Mambo, 2001, d. Hou Hsiao-hsien, Taiwan/France, Palm Pictures
25. (tie) My Winnipeg, 2007, d. Guy Maddin, Canada, IFC Films
25. (tie) Saraband, 2003, d. Ingmar Bergman, Sweden/Italy/Germany/Finland/Denmark/Austria, Sony Pictures Classics
25. (tie) Spirited Away, 2001, d. Hayao Miyazaki, Japan, Studio Ghibli/Disney
25. (tie) I'm Not There., 2007, d. Todd Haynes, USA/Germany, The Weinstein Company

26. Gerry, 2002, d. Gus Van Sant, USA, Miramax

27. (tie) Distant [Uzak], 2002, d. Nuri Bilge Ceylan, Turkey, New Yorker Films
27. (tie) Dogville, 2003, d. Lars von Trier, Denmark/Sweden/UK/France/Germany/Norway/Finland/Netherlands, Lionsgate
27. (tie) The Royal Tenenbaums, 2001, d. Wes Anderson, USA, Touchstone/Criterion

28. (tie) Alexandra, 2007, d. Aleksandr Sokurov, Russia/France, Cinema Guild
28. (tie) demonlover, 2002, d. Olivier Assayas, France, Palm Pictures

29. (tie) Atanarjuat: The Fast Runner, 2001, d. Zacharias Kunuk, Canada, Lot 47 Films
29. (tie) Goodbye, Dragon Inn, 2003, d. Tsai Ming-liang, Taiwan, Wellspring

30. (tie) Longing [Sehnsucht], 2006, d. Valeska Grisebach, Germany, N/A
30. (tie) Secret Sunshine, 2007, d. Lee Chang-dong, South Korea, N/A
30. (tie) Vai e Vem [Come and Go], 2003, d. João César Monteiro, Portugal/France, N/A
30. (tie) Far from Heaven, 2002, d. Todd Haynes, USA/France, Focus Features

So to tally... directors with more than one showing: Apichatpong Weerasethakul (3), Hou Hsiao-hsien (3), Jia Zhang-ke (3), Gus Van Sant (2), Todd Haynes (2), Tsai Ming-liang (2), Aleksandr Sokurov (2), Claire Denis (2), Guy Maddin (2), the Dardenne brothers (2), Pedro Costa (2). Only 5 of the 54 are unavailable on DVD in the US, though both Pedro Costa films are planned (or at least strongly rumored) to be coming from Criterion. However, in looking at the list, there is a wave of sadness, seeing studios that are no more like New Yorker Films, Wellspring/Fox Lorber, USA Films, Lot 47 Films and Picturehouse, as well as ones that have fallen from grace but still existing in a smaller form like Palm Pictures and (meh) Miramax and New Line. Of course, a number of fabulous distribution studios have opened throughout the past ten years, from Cinema Guild, IFC Films, Benten Films and Oscilloscope as well as Palisades Tartan's restarting of the Tartan library, which brought Silent Light to screens this year. The biggest showing though for the studios still thriving would have to be Strand Releasing, who released 5 of the films above, including the "newest" of the lot, Lucrecia Martel's brilliant The Headless Woman [La mujer sin cabeza]. I wonder if it's an oversight that no 2009 film made the list or if the TIFF crowd was being overzealous with getting that list out. Also, notice only 2 documentaries and 1 short made the list, something I'm sure a handful of other lists will make up for.

Anyway, onto List #2 for Time Out New York, which polled a number of Big Apple-ish film critics, including Andrew Grant, Karina Longworth, Aaron Hillis and Kevin B. Lee (their individual top 10s can be found via this link). The list rounded to 50, but I'll only post the top 30 here, so you can check out the write-ups and #31-50 on their site.

01. Mulholland Drive, 2001, d. David Lynch, USA/France, Universal Studios
02. There Will Be Blood, 2007, d. Paul Thomas Anderson, USA, Paramount Vantage/Miramax
03. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, 2004, d. Michel Gondry, USA, Focus Features
04. The New World, 2005, d. Terrence Malick, USA/UK, New Line
05. In the Mood for Love, 2000, d. Wong Kar-wai, Hong Kong/China/France, USA Films/Criterion
06. Yi yi: A One and Two, 2000, d. Edward Yang, Taiwan/Japan, Fox Lorber/Criterion
07. Dogville, 2003, d. Lars von Trier, Denmark/Sweden/UK/France/Germany/Norway/Finland/Netherlands, Lionsgate
08. Zodiac, 2007, d. David Fincher, USA, Paramount
09. A Christmas Tale [Un conte de Noël], 2008, d. Arnaud Desplechin, France, IFC Films/Criterion
10. Friday Night [Vendredi soir], 2002, d. Claire Denis, France, Wellspring
11. Spirited Away, 2001, d. Hayao Miyazaki, Japan, Studio Ghibli/Disney
12. American Psycho, 2000, d. Mary Harron, USA/Canada, Lionsgate
13. Inland Empire, 2006, d. David Lynch, USA/Poland/France, Absurda
14. Trouble Every Day, 2002, d. Claire Denis, France/Germany/Japan, Lot 47 Films
15. Domestic Violence, 2001, d. Frederick Wiseman, USA, Zippora Films
16. Punch-Drunk Love, 2002, d. Paul Thomas Anderson, USA, Columbia Pictures
17. Gosford Park, 2001, d. Robert Altman, UK/USA/Italy, Universal Studios
18. Femme Fatale, 2002, d. Brian De Palma, France/USA, Warner Bros.
19. I'm Not There., 2007, d. Todd Haynes, USA/Germany, The Weinstein Company
20. The Mad Songs of Fernanda Hussein, 2001, d. John Gianvito, USA, Extreme Low Frequency Productions
21. Brokeback Mountain, 2005, d. Ang Lee, USA/Canada, Focus Features
22. Synecdoche, New York, 2008, d. Charlie Kaufman, USA, Sony Pictures Classics
23. The Death of Mr. Lăzărescu [Moartea domnului Lăzărescu], 2005, d. Cristi Puiu, Romania, Tartan Films
24. I Heart Huckabees, 2004, d. David O. Russell, USA/Germany, Fox Searchlight
25. Inglourious Basterds, 2009, d. Quentin Tarantino, USA/Germany, The Weinstein Company/Universal Studios
26. Kings and Queen [Rois et reine], 2004, d. Arnaud Desplechin, France, Wellspring
27. Oldboy, 2003, d. Park Chan-wook, South Korea, Tartan Films
28. Before Sunset, 2004, d. Richard Linklater, USA, Warner Independent
29. Songs from the Second Floor [Sånger från andra våningen], 2000, d. Roy Andersson, Sweden/Norway/Denmark, New Yorker Films
30. Children of Men, 2006, d. Alfonso Cuarón, UK/USA/Japan, Universal Studios

While Time Out's list is certainly more US-centric than TIFF's, I can't find much bad to say about a list that includes Brian De Palma's Femme Fatale in the top 20 (and even included one film I'd never heard of: The Mad Songs of Fernanda Hussein... another highlight of checking out lists as these, if only that particular DVD wasn't already out-of-print). I don't know how I feel about Inglourious Basterds as the highest ranked 2009 film (and, in fact, the only one). The remainder of the list contains some real surprising and/or underrated treasures like Ramin Bahrani's Man Push Cart, Michael Mann's Miami Vice and Lukas Moodysson's Lilya 4-ever [Lilja 4-ever], as well as some contemptible ones like The 40-Year-Old Virgin (and, yeah, Donnie Darko). The only film that absolutely does not belong on the big 30 is I Heart Huckabees, while a few dangle on that line (American Psycho, Brokeback Mountain), keeping my personal preference against a couple out of the mix. So here's to the close of the '00s! More list, I'm sure, are on hitting the "printer" right now. I can't wait to hear what Cahiers du cinéma rounds up.

The Decade List: (Some of) The Worst Films (2006)

I've been using the IMDb as a reference for film years when compiling films for the Decade List, and while I realize the site isn't always correct, it's a lot easier than looking elsewhere to find the first official screening of Phat Girlz. However, I've run into my first altercation when using the IMDb for 2006. By their records, 300, easily one of the worst films I've ever seen, is a 2006 movie because it played at something called the Austin Butt-Numb-a-Thon in December of that year. I don't know anything about this "fest," but I'm going to go ahead and disqualify that as a legitimate "film premiere." Black Snake Moan falls under the same category.

Anyway, I have little to say about the films below, but I've included links to shit I've written on them in the past. I've placed an asterisk next to the films that have a special sort of "awful" appeal, failures of a certain charm. I haven't given all of those titles a second look to gauge their level of camp appeal, but I can assure you both Snow Cake and Notes on a Scandal rise to the occasion. Cate Blanchett asking Judi Dench, "You wanna fuck me, Barbara?" and Sigourney Weaver's hilarious performance as a woman with autism in Snow Cake (not to mention how many bad-ass points Alan Rickman lost with his schoolgirl fussiness after confronting the man who killed Sigourney's daughter) are absolutely worth wasting your time over.

- Alpha Dog - d. Nick Cassavetes - USA
- Another Gay Movie - d. Todd Phillips - USA
- Art School Confidential - d. Terry Zwigoff - USA [also here]
- Basic Instinct 2 - d. Michael Caton-Jones - USA/Germany/UK/Spain [also here]
- The Black Dahlia - d. Brian De Palma - USA/Germany [also an appendix; and here]
- Boy Culture - d. Q. Allan Brocka - USA
- Broken Sky [El cielo dividido] - d. Julián Hernández - Mexico
- The Bubble - d. Eytan Fox - Israel [Winner of the "Best Way to Revive Your Otherwise Awful Film" Award at my first, and only, Fin de cinéma awards]
- Cars - d. John Lasseter, Joe Ranft - USA
- Confetti - d. Debbie Isitt - UK
- Cowboy Junction - d. Gregory Christian - USA
- Dans Paris - d. Christophe Honoré - France/Portugal
- Dirty Sanchez: The Movie - d. Jim Hickey - UK
- Eating Out 2: Sloppy Seconds - d. Phillip J. Bartell - USA
- Eternal Summer - d. Leste Chen - Taiwan
- Factory Girl - d. George Hickenlooper - USA
- For Your Consideration - d. Christopher Guest - USA [also here]
- The Fountain - d. Darren Aronofsky - USA*
- Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus - d. Steven Shainberg - USA
- Grimm Love [Rohtenburg] - d. Martin Weisz - Germany
- The Hills Have Eyes - d. Alexandre Aja - USA
- Idlewild - d. Bryan Barber - USA
- Marie Antoinette - d. Sofia Coppola - USA/France/Japan
- Murderous Intent [Like Minds] - d. Gregory J. Read - Australia/UK
- The Namesake - d. Mira Nair - India/USA
- Notes on a Scandal - d. Richard Eyre - UK*
- O Jerusalem - d. Elie Chouraqui - France/UK/Italy/Greece/Israel/USA [also here]
- Off the Black - d. James Ponsoldt - USA
- The OH in Ohio - d. Billy Kent - USA [also here]
- On ne devrait pas exister [We Should Not Exist] - d. Hervé P. Gustave - France
- One Third - d. Kim Yong-man - USA
- The Page Turner [La tourneuse de pages] - d. Denis Dercourt - France
- Phat Girlz - d. Nnegest Likké - USA
- Psychopathia Sexualis - d. Bret Wood - USA
- The Pursuit of Happyness - d. Gabriele Muccino - USA
- Snow Cake - d. Marc Evans - Canada/UK* [more on Sigourney]
- Southland Tales - d. Richard Kelly - USA/Germany/France*
- Tan Lines - d. Ed Aldridge - Australia
- Things to Do - d. Ted Bezaire - Canada
- The Tripper - d. David Arquette - USA
- The Unknown Woman [La sconosciuta] - d. Giuseppe Tornatore - Italy/France*
- Vacationland - d. Todd Verow - USA
- The West Wittering Affair - d. David Scheinmann - UK
- The Wicker Man - d. Neil LaBute - USA/Germany/Canada*
- The Wild - d. Steve 'Spaz' Williams - USA
- The Young, the Gay and the Restless - d. Joe Castro - USA
- Yours Emotionally! - d. Sridhar Rangayan - India/UK

Walerian Borowczyk, Laura Gemser, Jude Law in drag, punk rock in concert, Orson Welles, Ally McBeal and a lotta Ida Lupino! (Not all together, sadly)

I should point out a few things about the releases below. Firstly, IFC announced another few titles for DVD release, all of them genre flicks (of what quality, I'm not sure, as I haven't seen any of them), and I wonder when they're going to get around to their theatrical releases, instead of their VOD titles. Secondly, I've only mentioned Anchor Bay's re-release of the film Where the Day Takes You because it gives me the opportunity to mention that it's easily one of the worst films I've ever seen. It's this dishonest, cheeseball Gen-X exposé of street kids in Los Angeles with a silly cast of once-famous-but-still-recognizable actors. Laughable doesn't begin to describe Hollywood's fallible attempt here, but my friend Chris and I wanted to program a So-Bad-They're-Still-Not-Good film festival and make a double-feature of Where the Day Takes You and John Singleton's dreadful Higher Learning. It would be one miserable night!

Also, Liberation Entertainment announced November release dates for Sally Potter's Rage, which got scathing reviews at Berlin in February, and Caroline Bottaro's Queen to Play [Joyeuse] with Sandrine Bonnaire and Kevin Kline. I don't recall either film receiving a theatrical run. So if seeing Jude Law in drag suits your fancy... And finally, you can put down your pencil from all the letter-writing you've been doing to try to get Fox to finally release the complete Ally McBeal series onto DVD, 'cos your wishes have been granted; on the 6th of October, you can relive all the zaniness, all the dancing babies, all the unisex bathroom interactions and all the Vonda Shepard you want! I heard there were a lot of music rights issues which held up the US release; just please tell me it wasn't Vonda's fault. The DVDs are in descending order of release.

- Objectified, 2009, d. Gary Hustwit, Plexifilm, 29 September
- Ally McBeal, The Complete Series, 1997-2002, 20th Century Fox, 6 October, w. Calista Flockhart, Jane Krakowski, Peter MacNicol, Portia de Rossi, Lucy Liu, Courtney Thorne-Smith, Gil Bellows, Robert Downey Jr., Regina Hall, Dyan Cannon
- Drag Me to Hell, 2009, d. Sam Raimi, Universal, 6 October
- Fighter, 2007, d. Natasha Arthy, IFC Films, 13 October
- Left Bank [Linkeroever], 2008, d. Pieter Van Hees, IFC Films, 13 October
- The Objective, 2008, d. Daniel Myrick, IFC Films, 13 October
- Where the Day Takes You, 1992, d. Marc Rocco, Anchor Bay, 13 October, w. Dermot Mulroney, Lara Flynn Boyle, Balthazar Getty, Sean Astin, Will Smith, Rikki Lake, James LeGros, Kyle MacLachlan, Alyssa Milano, Rachel Ticotin, David Arquette, Laura San Giacomo
- Pageant, 2008, d. Ron Davis, Stewart Halpern-Fingerhut, Wolfe Releasing, 20 October
- God's Left Hand, Devil's Right Hand, 2006, d. Shusuke Kaneko, Tokyo Shock, 27 October
- The Art of Love [Ars armandi], 1983, d. Walerian Borowczyk, Severin, 24 November, w. Laura Betti
- The Cricket [La cicala], 1980, d. Alberto Lattuada, MYA Communication, 24 November, w. Virna Lisi
- The House on Sorority Row, 1983, d. Mark Rosman, Liberation Entertainment, 24 November
- Hunchback of the Morgue [El jorobado de la Morgue], 1973, d. Javier Aguirre, MYA Communication, 24 November
- The Lady Medic [La dottoressa del distretto militare], 1976, d. Nando Cicero, MYA Communication, 24 November, w. Edwige Fenech
- The Last Decameron [Sollazzevoli storie di mogli gaudenti e mariti penitenti - Decameron nº 69], 1972, d. Joe D'Amato, MYA Communication, 24 November
- Mad Dog Morgan, 1976, d. Philippe Mora, Troma, 2-Disc Limited Edition, 24 November, w. Dennis Hopper, Jack Thompson
- Queen to Play [Joueuse], 2009, d. Caroline Bottaro, Liberation Entertainment, 24 November, w. Sandrine Bonnaire, Kevin Kline, Jennifer Beals
- Rage, 2009, d. Sally Potter, Liberation Entertainment, 24 November, w. Judi Dench, Jude Law, Eddie Izzard, John Leguizamo, Dianne Wiest, Steve Buscemi, Adriana Barraza, Bob Balaban, Simon Abkarian
- The Real Emanuelle [Amore libero - Free Love], 1974, d. Pier Ludovico Pavoni, MYA Communication, 24 November, w. Laura Gemser
- Schoolgirl Hitchhikers [Jeunes filles impudiques], 1973, d. Jean Rollin, Redemption, 24 November


Below is a list of some of the titles Warner has made newly available since June as part of their Warner Archive collection. You'll find a lot of recurring stars (Elizabeth Taylor, Gary Cooper, Ida Lupino, John Barrymore, Al Jolson), as well as Brian De Palma's Get to Know Your Rabbit with Orson Welles; Jodie Foster in Carny; the cult concert film Urgh! A Music War; Otto Preminger's The Moon Is Blue; and Mel Ferrer's adaptation of Green Mansions with Audrey Hepburn and Anthony Perkins.

- ...All the Marbles, 1981, d. Robert Aldrich, w. Peter Falk
- Beau Brummel, 1924, d. Harry Beaymont, w. John Barrymore
- The Better 'Ole, 1926, d. Charles Reisner
- Big Boy, 1930, d. Alan Crosland, w. Al Jolson
- Boulevard Nights, 1979, d. Michael Pressman
- Bright Leaf, 1950, d. Michael Curtiz, w. Gary Cooper, Lauren Bacall, Patricia Neal
- Carny, 1980, d. Robert Kaylor, w. Gary Busey, Jodie Foster
- Colleen, 1936, d. Alfred E. Green
- Conspirator, 1949, d. Victor Saville, w. Elizabeth Taylor, Robert Taylor
- Cynthia, 1947, d. Robert Z. Leonard, w. Elizabeth Taylor, Mary Astor
- Dealing: Or the Berkeley-to-Boston Forty-Brick Lost-Bag Blues, 1972, d. Paul Williams, w. John Lithgow, Barbara Hershey

- Deep Valley, 1947, d. Jean Negulesco, w. Ida Lupino
- The Divine Lady, 1929, d. Frank Lloyd
- Don't Be Afraid of the Dark, 1973, d. John Newland
- The First Auto, 1927, d. Roy Del Ruth
- Fliration Walk, 1934, d. Frank Borzage
- Get to Know Your Rabbit, 1972, d. Brian De Palma, w. Orson Welles, Katharine Ross
- The Girl Who Had Everything, 1953, d. Richard Thorpe, w. Elizabeth Taylor
- Go Into Your Dance, 1935, d. Archie Mayo, Michael Curtiz, Robert Florey, w. Al Jolson
- Green Mansions, 1959, d. Mel Ferrer, w. Anthony Perkins, Audrey Hepburn
- Happiness Ahead, 1934, d. Mervyn LeRoy
- The Hard Way, 1943, d. Vincent Sherman, w. Ida Lupino

- It's a Big Country, 1951, d. Clarence Brown, Don Hartman, John Sturges, Richard Thorpe, Charles Vidor, Don Weis, William A. Wellman, w. Gary Cooper, Janet Leigh, Gene Kelly, Ethel Barrymore
- Juke Girl, 1942, d. Curtis Bernhardt, w. Ronald fucking Reagan
- Let Us Be Gay, 1930, d. Robert Z. Leonard
- Love Is Better Than Ever, 1952, d. Stanley Donen, w. Elizabeth Taylor
- The Man I Love, 1947, d. Raoul Walsh, w. Ida Lupino
- Mike's Murder, 1984, d. James Bridges, w. Debra Winger
- Min and Bill, 1930, d. George W. Hill
- The Moon Is Blue, 1953, d. Otto Preminger, w. William Holden
- Nora Prentiss, 1947, d. Vincent Sherman
- Old San Francisco, 1927, d. Alan Crosland
- One Sunday Afternoon, 1933, d. Stephen Roberts, w. Gary Cooper, Fay Wray

- Operator 13, 1934, d. Richard Boleslawski, w. Gary Cooper, Marion Davies
- Politics, 1931, d. Charles Reisner
- Ready, Willing and Able, 1937, d. Ray Enright
- Reducing, 1931, d. Charles Reisner
- Rhapsody, 1954, d. Charles Vidor, w. Elizabeth Taylor
- Saratoga Trunk, 1945, d. Sam Wood, w. Gary Cooper, Ingrid Bergman
- Say It with Songs, 1929, d. Lloyd Bacon, w. Al Jolson
- The Sea Hawk, 1924, d. Frank Lloyd
- Shipmates Forever, 1935, d. Frank Borzage
- The Singing Fool, 1928, d. Lloyd Bacon, w. Al Jolson
- The Singing Kid, 1936, d. William Keighley, w. Al Jolson

- The Story of Mankind, 1957, d. Irwin Allen, w. The Marx Brothers, Hedy Lamarr, Agnes Moorehead, Vincent Price, Peter Lorre, Cesar Romero, John Carradine, Dennis Hopper
- The Story of Three Loves, 1953, d. Vincente Minnelli, Gottfried Reinhardt, w. Kirk Douglas, Leslie Caron, Ethel Barrymore, James Mason, Agnes Moorehead, Zsa Zsa Gabor
- Task Force, 1949, d. Delmer Daves, w. Gary Cooper
- The Terminal Man, 1974, d. Mike Hodges, w. George Segal
- Today We Live, 1933, d. Howard Hawks, Richard Rosson, w. Joan Crawford, Gary Cooper
- The Unfaithful, 1947, d. Vincent Sherman
- Urgh! A Music War, 1981, d. Derek Burbidge, w. The Police, Toyah Willcox, Wall of Voodoo, Oingo Boingo, Echo & the Bunnymen, XTC, Jools Holland, Klaus Nomi, The Go-Go's, Dead Kennedys, Gary Numan, Joan Jett, Magazine, The Cramps, Devo, Gang of Four, X, UB40
- Week-End at the Waldorf, 1945, d. Robert Z. Leonard, w. Ginger Rogers, Lana Turner
- When a Man Loves, 1927, d. Alan Crosland, w. John Barrymore
- Who Is Killing the Great Chefs of Europe?, 1978, d. Ted Kotcheff, w. George Segal, Jacqueline Bisset, Jean-Pierre Cassel
- Wonder Bar, 1934, d. Lloyd Bacon, w. Al Jolson, Dolores del Rio

The Decade List: Femme Fatale (2002)

Femme Fatale - dir. Brian De Palma

Losing faith in a director you once held so dear is a difficult enterprise. Woody Allen sure has taken us through plenty of ups and downs in the past fifteen years. Even Wim Wenders' biggest fans have found little to like in the director's post-Wings of Desire narratives. And I don't even recognize Dario Argento or George A. Romero any more. So when a director like De Palma makes a film like Femme Fatale, the bias sets in, and while certainly less than the films that made you fall in love with him in the first place, it takes you back to the good ol' days. Femme Fatale is not a good film, but more than the offensively misfired The Black Dahlia, Snake Eyes and Mission to Mars, it's a pleasant reminder of what kind of a filmmaker De Palma once was.

With signature bravado, Femme Fatale opens at the Cannes Film Festival where a jewel heist is underway. Thankfully, since it's De Palma, the heist isn't without its share of naked women and lesbian bathroom hook-ups. Elite con artist Laure (Rebecca Romijn-Stamos) takes off with the loot and changes her identity in order to hide from her former partners she double-crossed. It doesn't really matter what happens in Femme Fatale, but how it happens. It's loaded with your typical De Palma/Hitchcock allusions, so many I lost count. And it's awfully sleazy.

Donning an occasional French accent that's more effective than any of the various ones Angelina Jolie has delivered, Romijn-Stamos is game for De Palma's lurid erotica. Very few actresses have given themselves so fully to a director for such low pursuits, and bless her heart for doing so. Whether tossing clothes, performing lap dances, feeling up busty women or getting raped on pool tables, Romijn-Stamos is thoroughly unself-conscious, which elevates De Palma's technically skilled, perfumed trash to a level of guilt-free dissoluteness. I probably won't ever rank Femme Fatale alongside Carrie, Body Double, Blow Out or The Untouchables, but it's the closest thing to a "return to form" that we'll hope to see from him.

With: Rebecca Romijn-Stamos, Antonio Banderas, Peter Coyote, Eriq Ebouaney, Edouard Montoute, Rie Rasmussen, Thierry Frémont, Régis Wargnier, Sandrine Bonnaire, Eva Darlan, Jean-Marie Frin
Screenplay: Brian De Palma
Cinematography: Thierry Arbogast
Music: Ryuichi Sakamoto
Country of Origin: France
US Distributor: Warner Bros.

Premiere: 30 April 2002 (France)
US Premiere: 4 November 2002

The Decade List: (Some of) The Worst Films (2000)

Though I don't wish to devote time writing about the following films, I have made a shortlist of some of the significantly awful films from 2000 that I had the displeasure of seeing:

- Baise-moi - dir. Virginie Despentes, Coralie Trinh Thi - France
- Battle Royale - dir. Kinji Fukasaku - Japan
- Battlefield Earth - dir. Roger Christian - USA
- Big Momma's House - dir. Raja Gosnell - USA
- Boys and Girls - dir. Robert Iscove - USA
- The Crow: Salvation - dir. Bharat Nalluri - USA/Germany
- Dr. T & the Women - dir. Robert Altman - USA/Germany
- Groove - dir. Greg Harrison - USA
- Hollow Man - dir. Paul Verhoeven - USA/Germany
- How the Grinch Stole Christmas - dir. Ron Howard - USA/Germany
- The Iron Ladies - dir. Youngyooth Thongkonthun - Thailand
- Km. 0 - dir. Yolanda García Serrano, Juan Luis Iborra - Spain
- Malèna - dir. Giuseppe Tornatore - Italy/USA
- Mission: Impossible 2 - dir. John Woo - USA/Germany
- Mission to Mars - dir. Brian De Palma - USA
- Pay It Forward - dir. Mimi Leder - USA
- The Smokers - dir. Kat Slater - USA
- Stardom - dir. Denys Arcand - Canada/France
- Vulgar - dir. Bryan Johnson - USA

Listmania! The Films of 2008, Part 4

I think this shall represent the final purging of the trivia rattling around my brain from 2008.

Welcome Miscellaneous Events of the Year: Nicholas Stoller and David Koepp making good use of Russell Brand and Ricky Gervais


I'm not really a fan of either British comedian, but in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and Ghost Town both were great, playing to their strengths and their public personas perfectly. It's even made me like them a bit. It's miraculous.

Honourable Mentions:
Kate Beckinsale's strong performance in Snow Angels. So much better when not modelling rubber pants.
Seeing RADA-trained Shakespearean actor Adrian Lester playing a gun-toting hardass in Doomsday and seemingly relishing it.
The arrival of Rebecca Hall as a formidable screen presence.
Tim Roth's excellent performance as Emil Blonsky in The Incredible Hulk (usually I'm not a fan of his).

Unwelcome Miscellaneous Events of the Year: Fox being the biggest assholes in the world for trying to ruin the release of Watchmen. Will there be a boycott of X-Men Origins: Wolverine as a result? I'd like to hope it happens.


Dishonourable Mentions:
The incomprehensibility of the action scenes in Quantum of Solace and Eagle Eye.
The truly disheartening career choices of Al Pacino.
Taraji P. Henson's bizarre stereotypical acting choices in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.
George Lucas's decision to make the character of Ziro the Hutt a weird lisping cross-dresser with Truman Capote's voice in Star Wars: The Clone Wars. An entire planet says, "WTF?"

Best Poster: The Dark Knight



Worst Poster: Bangkok Dangerous


Best Advertising Campaign of the Year: Cloverfield


After the trailer from last year, the campaign never really put a foot wrong. By the time the movie came out, there was no way even the worst reviews would have stopped us watching it.

Worst Advertising Campaign of the Year: The Incredible Hulk

Slender trailers, a couple of crappy TV spots, an inability to control the grouchy star (other than a funny bit on Jimmy Kimmel), and eventually, just before the release, a huge emphasis on the appearance of Robert Downey Jr., and the end of the movie being re-edited to give that tiny scene more prominence. No wonder the movie didn't make as much money as hoped. It all made the movie look like this rush-job trying to find an empty weekend during the busy summer season, but even a cursory look at the extras on the DVD show the astonishing amount of hard work and thought that went into it. Such a shame. Anyway, here's the Kimmel thing. It's the only vaguely good thing to come out of the shockingly mishandled campaign.



Least Discreet Advertising Campaign of the Year:


Wanted's many trailers gave away pretty much every WOW moment of the film. As the plot (minus the crazy Loom of Fate and exploding rats stuff) was very similar to the comic, it felt like a waste of time actually sitting through the movie. I can see that the movie was a tough sell, but couldn't they have kept some more stuff back for the film?

Coolest and Most Apt Cameo Sadly Relegated to a Deleted Scene on a DVD: Ghostface Killah in Iron Man

Most Deliriously Batshit Action Movie of the Year: Rambo


Honourable Mentions: Vantage Point, Eagle Eye, Chocolate

Vocal Sound Effect of the Year: “Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!” (Clint Eastwood - Gran Torino)

Catchphrase of the Year: "Let! Us! Fuck!" (Zack and Miri Make A Porno)

Most Welcome Trend of the Year (Other Than The Grudging Critical Respect Aimed At The Superhero Genre): The New Horror Renaissance


It's been going on for a while now, but even so, this year we were lucky enough to get Eden Lake, [Rec], The Orphanage, Let The Right One In and, arguably, the interesting adaptation of Scott Smith's horror classic The Ruins, all of which were of varying degrees of quality but definitely in the "very good" column. I feel like adding Neil Marshall's hugely entertaining Doomsday to that list, for being in such debt to John Carpenter, James Cameron, and George Miller, who all know how to make a suspenseful or horrifying movie. Marshall has shown he can duplicate those talents with ease. If I'm going to add that, I'll even make a case for Stuart Gordon's excellent Stuck, which is macabre, ghoulish, nail-biting suspense, as well as being a terrific comment on poverty and the pressures put on the working class, and features an excellent performance from Stephen Rea. It's been a long time since I was excited by the horror genre, and it's an odd feeling.

Least Welcome Trend of the Year: Post-Modern Cinema-Verite Movies about the War in Iraq

Don't get me wrong, it's vital we keep our eye on that war, and never forget that people are suffering there in simply horrible ways, but whereas documentaries like No End in Sight, Taxi To The Dark Side, and Standard Operating Procedure do their best to illuminate by giving voice to as many different observers as possible, Nick Broomfield's Battle For Haditha and Brian De Palma's Redacted try to create a different kind of "truth" by either recreating an atrocity or by staging a po-mo video collage of a fictional atrocity based on a real one. Both movies come from an honest place but mangle the truth through their different approaches; Broomfield with his docu-drama retelling, De Palma with his formalist tricks (fake French documentary footage, YouTube videos, CCTV, hand-held camera shots from soldiers documenting the events). Both movies intentionally feature non-actors playing unconvincing characters (more like avatars) saying clunky expositional dialogue, and featuring some bizarre choices.

For instance, Broomfield invents a composite character who is a major protagonist during the horrifying massacre of innocents. If you don't see the accompanying documentary (the name of which eludes me, regrettably) then you wouldn't know this, and you would assume that somehow that person had given his consent to Broomfield that he could show him in the film, or had had some hand in telling Broomfield what he was thinking and feeling throughout. As he didn't, all of that is now suspect, and whatever horrors the film presents are dulled by that knowledge. Just as annoying, Redacted is not based on a real event, due to legal difficulties, and as such seems like little more than a remake of Casualties of War. Even though we know there was indeed an incident similar to this, the film just muddies the waters and makes it harder for the viewer to figure out what is really going on over there.


As for the hand-held camera, it's not a convention I usually object to. I just think it really only works in movies like Cloverfield and [Rec], where using the participant frame as a method of generating new ways of delivering shocks to the audience is far more tasteful than, say De Palma's use of it. Even more annoying is that is has been proved that a docu-drama can be made that hews as close to the objective truth as it is possible to. Paul Greengrass' astonishing United 93 should be a template to follow, made with as much attention to detail and first-hand accounting as it is possible to. Admittedly Broomfield couldn't get the same level of access to the real participants as Greengrass, but still, there are avoidable choices made that damage his movie.

It's doubly frustrating because these are stories that need to be told and, especially in the case of Haditha, were done with such incredibly good intentions. This article by Broomfield shows how committed he was to telling this story to the best of his abilities. Unfortunately, in the telling of them, by blurring the lines of fact and fiction, and by filling the characters' mouths with words that no normal person would ever say, they have inadvertently distanced the audience from the real horrors. They're still essential viewing, though.

Most Relentless Use of Religious Imagery in a Science Fiction Tale: Dante 01


Dishonourable Mention: Wall*E

Best Hair: Viggo Mortensen's face fuzz (Appaloosa)


He looks like a bit of a dandy but he will fuck you up, for reals.

Worst Hair: Nicolas Cage (Bangkok Dangerous)


Does using shampoo ruin his deadly assassin's aim or something?

Most Improbably Styled Hair: Camilla Belle's pristine dreads in 10000 B.C.


Apparently we're descended from Rasta Valley Girls.

Best Use of Kristen Wiig: Ghost Town


Worst Use of Kristen Wiig: Cutting her entirely out of the cinema release of Forgetting Sarah Marshall



Adorable Screen Couple of the Year: Robert Downey Jr. and Gwyneth Paltrow (Iron Man)


Honourable Mentions:
Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks (Zack and Miri Make a Porno), Mos Def and Melonie Diaz (Be Kind Rewind)

Crap Screen Couple of the Year: Vin Diesel and Mélanie Thierry (Babylon A.D.)


Dishonourable Mentions: Shia LaBeouf and Michelle Monaghan (Eagle Eye), Hayden Christensen and Rachel Bilson (Jumper)

Inappropriate and Just Downright Creepy Screen Couple of the Year: Kåre Hedebrant and Lina Leandersson (Let The Right One In)


"Oh Man, At Last!" Couple of the Year: Harrison Ford and Karen Allen (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull)


"Jesus, Just Split Up Already!" Couple of the Year: Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel (The Happening)


Dishonourable Mention: Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet (Revolutionary Road), Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman (The Strangers)

Most Awkward and Unconvincing Couple of the Year: Edward Norton and Liv Tyler (The Incredible Hulk)


Utterly Improbable Couple of the Year: James McAvoy and Angelina Jolie (Wanted)


Dishonourable Mention: Jim Sturgess and Kate Bosworth (21)

Most Gratuitous Kissing Between Two Hotties Just So The Director Can Get His Rocks Off: Penelope Cruz and Scarlett Johansson in Vicky Cristina Barcelona


Worst Ending to a Relationship: Kate Beckinsale and Hott Sam Rockwell in Snow Angels


Dishonourable Mentions: Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet (Revolutionary Road), Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman (The Strangers)

Likeable Manic Pixie Dream Girl of the Year: Rachel Jansen (Mila Kunis - Forgetting Sarah Marshall)


Honourable Mention: Chloë - (Clémence Poésy - In Bruges)

Unlikeable Manic Pixie Dream Girl - Valentina (Natalya Rudakova - Transporter 3)


Dishonourable Mention: Fox (Angelina Jolie - Wanted)

Convincing Lust Object of the Year: Daniel Craig (Quantum of Solace)


Honourable Mention: Javier Bardem (Vicky Cristina Barcelona)

Unconvincing Lust Object of the Year: Al Pacino (88 Minutes)


Dishonourable Mention: Kate Bosworth (21)

"Kate Winslet In Little Children" Award For Least Believable Unattractiveness: Marisa Tomei in The Wrestler


We're supposed to think Tomei, as stripper Cassidy, looks so old that no one wants her to dance for them? Bullshit. She's looking as good as ever, though kudos to her for selling that plot point.

Most Amusing Critical Crush of the Year: Stephanie Zacharek's potentially compromising soft spot for Jason Statham

At the end of the year, Stephanie Zacharek, film critic for Salon, had her end of year list (somewhat smaller than mine), with a big list of honourable mentions. Among the usual suspects, there was also The Bank Job and Transporter 3, two movies that really are just not that good. When we had a closer look at her reviews for both movies, we found out why: Stephanie + Jason 4evah!


Hilariously, her reviews for both movies (and Death Race, which she was also easy on), were basically mash notes to the Brit Bruiser. Here are some highlights:

"Statham is sexy all right, with that beefcake-pinup chest, but the sexiest thing about him is what's going on upstairs, and his voice alone is delectable: It sounds like a cat's tongue feels." (Transporter 3)

"The look in Statham's eyes reassures [Keeley Hawes] more than his words ever could -- they have a melting quality that counterbalances the rough, masculine raspiness of his voice. In the press notes for "The Bank Job," Donaldson says that Statham reminds him of a British Steve McQueen, and the comparison makes sense. In "The Bank Job," Statham is a sex symbol with a soul..." (The Bank Job)

"Anderson's camera [casts] its unapologetically erotic view on Statham's perfectly chiseled mug -- his stubble is so artfully dappled it could have been painted by Carravagio... There's no doubt he makes a fine physical specimen in any picture: His muscles have that mysterious filmic quality of looking both rock-hard and pillowy at once... Statham moves with such easy grace that you don't have to work hard to believe him. And if he can stand up to Joan Allen, melting her predatory stare with his own molten gaze, then it's clear he's not just the prettiest guy on the prison block, but also the toughest." (Death Race)

I wish she had reviewed In The Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale as well. I'd wager she definitely owns it.

Okay, I reckon that should be enough. Normal service can be resumed now.